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Sophie is Home!

Sophie & the BowWhen I first wrote about Sophie, I gave the first post the title “Sophie’s Homecoming”. Now, my title reads “Sophie is Home”; so what’s the difference?

Sophie’s homecoming was about her behavior, reactions, and adjustments that first day, week and first several months that I observed. Now, eight months later, I sense from my observations, that she is truly home. Truly home meaning totally relaxed, confident, playful and all the things I surmise feeling at home might mean for her. In so many ways, I compare this to when we humans feel at home after arriving in a new place.

She has her favorite spots, her favorite toys, routines; she plays, has her” I want to rest spot”, goes pee pee exactly in the appropriate place, runs away like a little devil when the brush comes out, along with all the little habits, which take time to form, and well I can go on and on.

You may think I’m anthropomorphizing, but all I can say is that she is a completely different dog than eight months ago, and even than 6 months ago, and I’m not the only one noticing. In fact, all my neighbors have noticed too.

So what’s my point? Well, my point is that when we humans adopt a human child, we usually get counseling, and ongoing support, with all sorts of information from social workers, adoption agencies, school teachers, etc. We’re also told all about the adjustment stages children go through after being in foster care, etc., and the amount of time it may take to achieve that “I’m Home” feeling. But what are we told, or counseled in about the adjustment and time needed when we adopt a dog or cat for them to feel at home?

While human needs are more complicated of course, the dogs and cats we adopt have deep feelings, and need adjustment time too. Maybe much more than many people realize. And just as matching children to the right family is vital to the success of the adoption, so is matching a companion animal to the right family also vital for success. Unlike human adoptions, animal adoption decisions are commonly made within a visit or two to shelters.

According to a recent study,

“The majority of the 6 to 8 million animals that are homeless each year are dogs (National Council on Pet Population Study & Policy, NCPPSP 2009; Humane Society of the United States 2010). Of the dogs that end up at shelters each year, most arrive there because of owner relinquishment. Worldwide, studies reveal that a significant number of adopted dogs are returned to shelters. The return rate of dogs to shelters ranges from about 15% +(Mondelli et al. 2004) to 50% (NCPPSP 2009). Approximately 60% (American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, ASPCA 2011a) are euthanized.

In an attempt to keep so many dogs from being euthanized, pet adoption has been promoted, but with limited success. There is a need to reduce the number of dogs relinquished each year by owners. One way to achieve this is to understand the factors related to pet satisfaction”. 1.

Calling upon my own psychology studies, I’d like to add that expectations play a large role in success or failure of the things we choose. Unrealistic expectations can lead to disappointments, and my guess is this plays a role also in why so many people relinquish their dogs, adopted or not adopted. Whether this means unrealistic expectations of the companion animal chosen and the adjustment period, expectations of the responsibility, or not choosing the “right companion animal” or all of the above, realistic expectations prior to choosing an animal is part of what will make it successful.

The research paper goes on to give some reasons for relinquishing their dog based upon a unique study

“The problem of relinquished dogs is a worldwide concern. In Italy, in the first study of its kind (Mondelli et al. 2004), researchers reviewed questionnaire responses of people who returned a dog to a shelter. They found that, during a six-year period, 86.3% of dogs were adopted, and of these about 15.2% were returned. Of the people who returned a dog, 71.2% completed a survey. Responses indicated that 38.8% of these people returned the dog primarily for behavioral reasons. Some of the problematic behaviors were “vocalizes too much, hyperactive/stereotypes, destructive/soils house, escapes, and disobedient and problems with other pets.” Next, 34% stated management problems, which included “animal medical issue, no time for pets, personal or family reasons, pet conflict, small house, and no apparent owner”. Other reasons people returned dogs were aggression (14.9%), allergy (5.5%), and apartment block regulation (4.5%). In a few instances (2.3%), people did not give a reason for returning the dog (Mondelli et al. 2004).

I can only speak for myself. I had my own expectations and a few surprises from Sophie about her behavior, which as I stated in my first post would have been a deal breaker 25 years ago. Although I admit I would have never left a dog at a shelter. But since then I learned how deeply they feel, and I am still learning every day.

Sophie really is home, and my experience of watching her blossom from her previous unhappy life has been a joyful and fulfilling learning experience that I can’t help writing about.

Next: More on choosing a companion animal for a successful adoption.

Adopt and Save a Life!

1. Lisa A. Curb, Charles I. Abramson, et. Al, The Relationship between Personality Match and Pet Satisfaction among Dog Owners, ANTHROZOOS VOLUME 26, ISSUE 3

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Sophie and Me; the Love Grows!

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Well, haven’t written a new post for a couple of weeks since I’ve been in technology hell revolving around my new computer. But one thing keeps me smiling that is, observing my little Sophie. And even though I’ve been physically and mentally occupied with computer issues, I can’t help reflecting about my relationship with her and thus my feelings about all animals, and their emotions. I say my relationship, but more accurately as I reflect, it is our relationship, not just mine.

 

I’ve always been fascinated by the behavior I’ve observed in Charlie and Teddy, both individually, together, and each as they grew from puppyhood to adult. I also used to trace their behavior back to evolutionary biology, a favorite subject of mine. But with Sophie my little adoptee, it’s different. Sophie had just turned 2 when she came home with me 7 months ago, so the changes I am observing aren’t from aging out of puppyhood, and in fact, she has become just as puppyish as Charlie and Teddy were as puppies.

 

But more than her playfulness, I think I am witnessing her growing trust, and her growing love for me. Relationships are dynamic and reciprocal, that is they are based upon the effects both parties have on each other. Actions and reactions cause interactions, more reactions and so on. Studies have shown that while a mother’s behavior affects the behavior of her baby, the baby’s temperament and behavior has an equal effect on the mother, which in turn then affects the mother’s behavior toward the baby, and so on. Hence, so it goes between me and Sophie. A reciprocal relationship as all relationships are.

 

When I first brought Sophie home it was barely a month that I had said goodbye to Teddy after a long battle with her illness. I wasn’t sure how much love I could feel so soon for another dog. But I knew in my heart that I love dogs, and that focusing on her needs and her individuality would result in my affection growing.

Of course, there was some frustration along the way particularly with figuring out why Sophie insisted on using my bed as a giant wee wee pad, but it feels like ancient history now. And I’m amazed that it feels as though the issue didn’t even exist. Maybe it’s because we have developed a loving positive relationship that has overridden any negative.

 

I am also amazed that I feel Sophie’s love now. Yes she gives me belly, that is, she lies on her back, legs up in the air so I can rub and kiss her belly. But more than that, she now gazes at length into my eyes, she cuddles and snuggles against me tucking her head under my chin, and I especially love when she lies on my chest facing me, looks at me and gives me kisses. And none of this involves treats!

 

One of the behaviors that she now also exhibits is a lack of fear with me, which swells my heart with affection. For instance, in the beginning when I would brush her, she would remain totally still although I could observe it was not her favorite thing. Now, she fights me, squirms, and well, she makes it pretty difficult for me. Thinking back. I can’t help but smile, she’s no longer afraid to fight the grooming.

 

I said in one of my earlier blogs that I expected that adopting an adult dog would be different than bringing home a puppy, bought or otherwise. Adult dogs have histories, too many unfortunately not good. So while all of us, human or non- human have individual personalities, puppies are kind of a clean slate. Adopted dogs come with experiences that mold their behaviors. Earning their love and trust is different than earning the love and trust of a puppy.

 

I never thought about this raising Charlie and Teddy, why would I. They were bundles of energy, and mischief. I had much joy and love from them, and I loved them for who they were individually. Now, I am experiencing what it is like to overcome history, with love, and patience, kindness and positive conditioning. And what feels so special is feeling her trust and love grow for me as a result.

 

Adopt and Save a Life!

 

Next: George, a rescue visits Sophie!